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Women, Verses, For or Against Women!
Sometime ago there were some unpleasant comments directed at me on this site, I recieved many e-mails from persons
asking me to either ignore the people doing it, in some mails people ask me how was I able to continue?,
if they were in my place, they would have stopped commenting on the site.
Well we all have different opinions, and for me, I am not one that lets negetavity destroy me, if I allowed this
I would not have been where I am today.
How did I do it? I applied the secret. I am determined not to let anyone do
or say anything to or about me to get to my beautiful soul. I have not time for negativity in my being.
Now apparently some people have a problem with my simple english, which is my unique way of getting my story out, I am not expecting everyone who reads my story to pull a dictionary to understand me here. Simple english has not died, it worked before, it should be able to work now.
This is why I have chossen to write about how we women treat each other, which is something that I have seen grow within our community, and something that, if not addressed will become a serious problem in society.
Now I will take the time to address 'Women' all of us, myself included. I know it was a woman or some women who were directing those remarks at me on the site. Men do not have time for such, or should I say, not many. For the record men have the time to love me, they'll send me a nice personal e-mail instead! Thanks Men!
Ladies, we all fit in one class (Women)
We may look, think, speak, act, do things, or even appear differently, but the truth is we are all the same. It's high time we stop
trying to destroy eachother, we are better than this, we have better things in stock for ourselves, we know better than that.
Growing up in the community, we watched our mothers, grand mothers, aunts, sisters, sister-in laws etc, go through the same
struggles that we are all going through these days. Somehow, we turn round and try to fight down or destroy eachother the
best way we know how to. Why do we feel the need to shame eachother, why do we feel the need to destroy eachothers
reputation.
We all relate to eachother in one way or the other, mostly all of us have been through the same struggles, some of us may be a little more fortunate than the other but nonetheless the ones who are, must know another woman who has seen the struggles.
For some reason or the other we feel big in our skins, when we say something we know will bring shame to another woman or hurt
her feelings. What then, if anything, do we achieve. Too many times we try to use our tongues to hurt a sister. If we want to make a change in society, why don't we begin with ourselves?
We have to begin from somewhere, let's begin with the (Moi) let us quit slapping each other with mistakes or bad judgements from their past lives, let bygones be bygones, if a sister is trying to make a change to her life, we feel the need to confront her with what ever dirt that we think we know, what do we achieve from doing this?
Why don't we improve, conduct, discipline, ourselves and live a legacy of decent ladylike behaviour for the younger ones who will replace us in society, what are we expecting for our children and grand children, more ignorance or a future of hope. Stop accusing, quit finding faults, with the other women amoung us.
Much has not changed, we still have far to go, we all know that we do. I look at us today, we do the same things we have been doing all our lives on a daily basis. Mind you this is what our ancestors did as well.
Women get up to the same old routines everyday, we carry the family burdens on our backs like a heavy load that we can't put down, we are in charge of everything that's goes on in our household, we make sure, that our future and the future of our families are safe, or at least going to be, we are still the old maids we have been years ago, it's like our place is only the home and the woman of the house, it's like it's only the women that's the parent, it's like it's only the women who know how to attend a parent teachers meeting, it's like you mother this and you mother that, it like we don't all know what we keep getting it all the time.
We know our own struggles, and that of other women like us, with relationships, families, economy, religion, children, education, and so on and we have seen the struggles of others, so let's shut our mouths about each other and try our best to support each other , the best way possible. For if it's one thing a woman knows it's the pain of another woman, she may not know the extent but we all know that we have been there or at least we know someone who has.
If we are honest we all will remember sometime ago in our community, the people of Patience, La Point , Lumabrd, Malgretout and Praislin were considered second class or third I can't remember, but I'm sure most of us remember there were a set of people from our community, that was considered, 'IT' if you know what I mean.
Well those times are gone, this was done to many because there was low self esteem amoung us, we were ignorant about alot of things,
I am not saying that the other people were not ignorant too, there was more ignorance in those days within the whole community, and I must say ignorance still exsist, this is mainly the reason for our ugly behaviour, so why are we not seeing that these things don't last, they don't make us better, if any thing I think it makes very guilty and it also shows a cowardly sign.
We are all one people, we belong to one community, we used to laugh and cry with eachother, and now we want to oppress each other, we don't try to encourage our peers and the people we once knew, instead we ask 'what and whom does she think she is? She is who she is, and no two people are alike, so why don't we accept who she is and if she makes a mistake try to guide her and help her pull through.
From what I have noticed happening on this site, we thrive on the threat of sending immigration to eachothers yard. We love the Immigration word. Like most of us migrated legally! Like most of us are legal ourselves, like others don't know where to get ourselves legal, just like they did. Some of us make it our duty to find out if this one has 'PAPERS' Everyone has 'PAPERS' you can get 'PAPERS
anywhere? You can even get documents, even in the bin, you get papers and documents, you can get whatever you want to, you just have to tell you self that if there is one thing you need you can get it! 'Yes You Can!' and you will...Who is the Woman? The Woman?...You? Me? Did you come up with the same answer? OK? Well.....
She is the woman whom neither you nor I, can be. Why? because she is the only one who can be her.
Why do we feel the need to shame her, why do we feel the need to help encourage another woman to help destroy her reputation.
What do we then teach the women of the future, who we are leaving with the legacy of destroying each other, when will we put a stop to our unpleasant behaviour. Why don't we support, encourage, love, respect, acknowledge, applaud, congratulate eachother in whatever the she chooses to do. Why don't we keep praying for ourselves and eachother and mean every word of it.
We all have different skills, levels of intelligence, of wisdom, knowledge, power, talents, etc, but you know what, that doesn't make us better than the other, this is what makes us unique, this is our gift, still amoung us, we can only do one at a time, because we are one being. God accepts us all, he doesn't have rejects, he forgives, he listens, he forgives, he comforts, he forgives, he loves and he forgives again and again, and if he does all this for us, why don't we begin helping him help us.
Being more intelligent than one doesn't necessarily mean you are smarter.
Having more skills than one, doesn't always mean you can make more money.
Being more religious than one, doesn't mean God only hears your prayers.
Life doesn't always hand us milk and honey, sometimes unfortunately we make bad judgements, mistakes, decisions etc, and we
end up in a position where we need each other or more so the support of eachother, but for the life of me, I really don't understand why some of us make it our duty to keep a women like us in the gutter and if she makes an effort to get out of there, we drag he back into it with all the strength we have.
Women don't let any other woman bring you down, we are not perfect, we all are capable of making changes in our lives, and if anyone throws dust in your face, shake this dust out of you body and when that same dust reaches the ground, take a step upward and I can gaurantee you one thing, you'll be happy you did.
Don't let anyone get to you, because you know what, if she knows that she has gotten to you, she is happy, she won, but if she realizes that no matter what she does, you can't care less, you are still full of life, good spirit, you remain calm, you are in control of youself, she then gets really upset at herself and directs her anger towards you at herself and the rest is history. The Lords Prayer is the most powerful prayer, and it doesn't go unheard. Not at all.
posted by monrepossports at
7:52 PM
26 Comments:
"WELL DONE MY GIRL" could not have said it better myself,another "Masterpiece"
Phyllis, you would think with all the things the women in our life went through would make us stronger and stick together. In this world we live in, we have no reason to tear down each other. Life is too short, we never know when we're going to need each other. Maybe it's not borrowing some 'sik' or 'sel' or 'a biskit' whateve it may have been there, today it's the same concept. We may need a ride to work, need to babysit each other's children, whatever it is, it hasn't changed. And for the record, there is nothing wrong with simple english. Women are supposed to be strong. men don't have that problem. Men will have beef with each other but will have a drink together. women don't let things go, they gossip, they talk about each other, make little comments when they see u pass. Maybe jealousy, hate, envy, who knows. Women are complex adn full of hormones, so excuse them!
You are so right, you know, we don't sit and reflect upon our lives, we don't realize that God put us here for a reason. We have very little time here and we don't realize that every minute counts,so instead of using our time to heal the world, we choose to fight eachother. Now what does this mean, how do we expect others to treat us different when we fight our own kind? Look at us we all have clothes and shoes hanging in our closets, like no bodys business, when we can only wear one at a time, and tell me if I'm not talking about the majority here. We sometimes don't even have a reason to wear an outfit because there is nothing to do nowhere to go, so we end up overdressing to go to the post office, we all go through the same issues. Let us look at our mother, if she is still with us...think of her, think of how she was able to pull through, tell me what you feel, are you not sorry? Every mother or Woman , how ever you want to call her, no matter how her children has grown, still feels the need to care for that child. If we consider ourselves women, let us find it in our selves to embrace the other woman, let us feel her pain and her struggles, let us hel her help herself, she doen't need us to work and throw money at her, she just needs us to accepr her for who she is. Some of us just look at another and come up with all kinds of assumptions about her, not giving her a chance to even prove to us that she is really not the picture some people have painted her to be. Lets share the love i know that we all have, and we all can make a difference together.
My sister, where do I begin….. life is not a bed of roses. Life is not fair. As women, we have come a long way. There was a time when we had no voice at all. We could not vote. We only had one use, and that was to make children. We could not say no to our husband. We could not get an education. Our thoughts and ideas remain just that. "All in all", we had no voice.
However, today it is different for us. We have a voice, but what is strange, is how women treats each other. We have no value for another woman's ideas. We are always putting the other woman down. We do not practice to love or honor what the other woman has to share, to make us better human being. women have so much in common, yet the do not adhere with each other on the level that they should.
Growing up in Mon Repos, there was a lot of thing about my mother's generation of women that I did not like. I knew that I wanted to have a different kind of life. I knew if I want to change my life, there would be some parts of my culture that I would have to change, but the question I asked myself many time was how. I knew that I had to borrow from other cultures, and going to America helped me do just that. I learn how to value other women and they voice that they possess.
In Mon Repos, women tend to blame other women when their husband left them for someone else instead of empathizing and sympathizing with them. Women also blame each other when there was a gossip. When one woman achieves something and another did not , there is always a negative opinion express. This is what I am seeing here on the site. I believe that it is a very good thing that this site exist. I know that would not be able to know what is happening in my small community, if it was not for the hard work of those who put this site together, and gave women like Phillys Wilson the opportunity to express and share the past stories of our lives , and where we are at now. I Bibiana Sharon Gayle-Cox, knows the true value of having women in my life.
There are quite a few women who have help shaped my life. My mother Frances, is one of those women. My great grand mother-Mama Rose is another, My sisters (all ten of them) , friends like Phillys, who when I was not sure what direction life was taking me in , let me know that women have to stick together, and all women goes through the same stuff, like heartbreak, financially instability, and uncertainties of life.
Philly, I have one message for u. This is it: if human being persecute JESUS, then sweetie, who are U, that they won’t harass. You gold here, is to try to see how you can get women to stop playing that hating game. This is not a easy job. ( u know nothing comes easy in this world), but you need to remember OBAMA, it was not an easy road for him, but he did it , so u can do it, send your message to all women who are strong, that if a woman is strong , productive , efficient, self-reliant and a motivator she will engage in a constructive discussion her on this blog and cease to nag at the opinion of other women who just want progress for her community. My hat goes out to u.
Thank you Sha!
Hey, looks like I have been missing the action! commented quite a lot on ur first blog and I am loving this one too. I must confess that I am doing this in a rush, so please excuse my mistakes -if any. Well girl, u know what they say...some people become insecure when others they used to lime with move on, or even more so when others they looked down at , surpass them in what they have been trying so hard to accomplish; good life education and PEACE! We women are the worst ones, we back bite, look back at the past and try to tarnish others reputation with the mistakes they made while going thru this journey called LIFE. Life is about making mistakes and growing from them and that is someting only the concerned individual need to do. No one else need to remind us of the rubbish we have done, we do enough of that already! so why waste ur precious time looking at anothers mistakes when u could be reflecting on urs while trying to learn from them? From what I gather others are just down right jealous of what Phyllis is doing, she has decided-yes that meant she had a CHOICE- to make her experiences; past and present positive ones instead of living a life of regrets. I say this is what I am also doing and it is wonderful! I live, I am happy and contented in my situation now, yet I strive for better, not because I regret or saddened by my life now, but because I know there is a lot more I could and will accomplish. But in the meantime I am enoying now! I also suspect that is exactly what my darling Phyllis is doing and I am so pleased for her. She is also very proud of herself. Man , look at the talent this woman has- not only is she beautiful but she can write! Hey, Phyllis, I am waiting patiently for ur book to hit the shelves, ok. Well don't tell me u have not started it... lol.
I read this book once about positive thinking and this quote stood out.. "the dog barks, but the caravan moves on" Book-the ELEPHANT and the TWIG- forgot the author. So let them bark and remain inthe same spot while those who wish to make something better of themselves and LIVE rather than simply EXIST!
U go girl, mighty WOMAN of valour!
sorry- after, simply EXIST should be added move on! lol
Thank you for your marvelous comment Anonymous...it was very well recieved and totally understood...I alway wondered why some of us have to behave this way. We thrive on the negatives that happen to our fellow men...instead of trying to make a difference. Now I must say too that God is a good God, because he is so good that he make his children look forward to more positive things in their lives, especially when they face adversity. You know some people expect me to crawl under a stone when they direct those comments at me....I'm telling you girl, it gives me more insights when it happens, I have one more thing to pray to my God about, and that is to ask him to intercede for them and to ask him to make this world a better place, to ask him to guide our younger generation so that they may not be brainwashed by these negative influences we are facing today. You would think that we gain knowledge as we grow older but sometimes I wonder whether these people really think they can do something to me by doing what they are doing to themselves on the site....because none of us may be able to see them...but the can't hide from one person...the person that's going to deal with the matter for me. You see very often we don't even realize that people can tell alot about us from the things that we write...I already know the people who direct these comments at me are scared of me like anything...for one...if you take a look at their comments, they do it so quickly like some one that thinks although they are in the privacy of their own place, they think that someone is watching...so I notice the haste in their typing...I laugh because I realize how much power the great Lord has...their cowardness shows just by their comments...I'm a child of the King just as they are...He watches over us all, he doesn't have favourites, he love us all, unconditionally and equally. Thanks again...looking forward to more blogging.
frist of all i must say, to u "Phillys" as always this is a wounderful piece u continue to bring the best out of many of us thank u.I have read ur piece many times but for the past few days i have come back to ur page for inspiration i have cry reading it this week ,cuz i never though some people in our community could be so heartless, have they never heard this simple words,"FORGIVENESS","RESPECT" we dont care about other people's feelings an to not expose their personal life on the site,we have no reason to tear a family who is grieving whom ever the father talk to it was was done in privet an sure yes every one have a right to his or her opinions lets do it in a way it wound not affect anyone emotions.god did not put us on this earth to be the judgement to others ,we need to think positive an give people a lift when they are down, like u said we all make bad judgement,mistakes,descision in out life, and we learn from them no one's life is perfect we all live an learn,that's what makes us better people i wish more people would read ur blog but then again it would open their eyes,& mind, any ways write something soon lets keep loving each other an being strong together.
Thank you again, well deary, not everyone sees life like we do and this is very unfortunate. If we realize that something we are doing leaves noting but pain and shame, why should we continue to do it?...Do we always want to see our neighbour suffer...do we take pride in watching others go through shame and hurt. No, we want a better world, we want our brothers and sisters to know that someone cares, that someone will give them the support, the love, the recognition and all that, when I'm not at my job, I do voluntary work at the Jewish General Hospital, and I look at the many people that are there, without family, who loves someone to come and even talk to them for about five minutes. They feel good about it....some of us think that we are going to remain like we are now forever...someone, somewhere will eventually have to care for us in the coming years and this is why we have to get right with God and stop hurting eachother, I can tell you, it's very hard for anyone to hurt me, because I am destined to make myself believe in me. All of us, especially women have to come together to support eachother and make our country and community proud...we should always think about the generations behind us...what examples we are setting...do we truly want the rest of the world to grow up with so much hatred towards each other...and while I'm there, I wonder what I have done to the people who keep directing those remarks at me....I think I know one reason, but you see, this reason, they don't know is very much behind me, but they seem to know that this reason can't stop loving me...so hence the hate....you see I am so far away from them but they still find me...They don't know I'm done! Stick a fork in me...I'm Done!
Trust me girlfriend, only a few will want what's best for their neighbours. Don't forget we live in a world that is full of wickedness, spiritual, in high places. Most people would only want to see themselves succeed. The rare as ruby ones who are always glad that others are progressing have learnt the lessons of the SECRET and are therefore not afraid that others will take from them, as they understand there is plenty for all...
I also want to remind u of what u said earlier, about not responding and so on. The truth is if u don't let them know they have gotten under ur skin then they will be left wondering, however if u respond to them, then that gives them more amuniton to continue their useless talk! So take ur advice and that of the positive books u continue to read and pretend u did not hear or see and trust me eventually u won't even notice! I am not sure if u have tried or are practising this but I have told my friends that I don't want to hear anything negative others have said, unless my life is in danger then keep gossip and 'malpalae' away from my ears. Anything that does not fortify my spirit I am not interested in!
U have shown over and over that u r bigger than this, ok g/friend? And remember we all have a past, whatever it is, it is in the past right? On the subject of volunteering, doesn't it just bring joy to give , give an give some more. I also volunteer and it is a great feeling and experience. As we know giving of anything u have , time money etc only attracts more to u.
Well u did not respond to my asking about ur book. Have u started? If u haven't thought about it, let my prompting be the seed sowed. I can see u have a lot to tell and u do it so well... So u go girl. May the secret be with u always, Chow
Hey anonymus,I am keeping the sectet close to heart and I have noticed likewise you! thanking you for all your wonderful contributions to my blog...way to roll homegirl! I am tring to put together some of my thoughts to assemble something..lol...I am hoping to have enough to say so that I can put it into a small book, but I first have to find out how to go about it...which I have not done...you know already with work and aevery other thing on my plate....someday when you have children you will understand...by the way hurry up and make those little pumkins eh...lol...they have to remember the young you..lol..and I'm sure you want to attend that graduation looking propah!...lol..lol.anyways gilrfriend it is always a pleasure to hear from you...keep the love flowing and keep the distance close. Even we are miles apart the spirit still brings us together...I am looking forward to more for all of us. Lovings my girl!
This is a 911 call from our kids in the nursing program in Cuba, right know many of them are ready to pack their bags an go home,why, because one of the government official from St Lucia came to their school to let them know that at the end of five years they will be leaving with a NA CERTIFICATE, now tell me what sense those that make .Most if not all of those kind a very intelligent an smart if from day one they told the kids that the program is an NA program how many of them do u think would have wasted five years just to become an NA ,that is just rediculous the kids knows the difference between an associates degree cirtificate and an NA cirtificate ok,if the government is going to offer the kids an NA cirtificate the like slap in the face the kids have no voice in Cuba an every one knows that, they are grateful an all but theya just having a hard time with this one
MS WILSON, LET ME START OFF LIKE A PROPER LADY, LOL, SCRAP THAT....I LOVE THIS PIECE ON SO MANY DIFFERENT LEVELS......IT'S INTERESTING THAT WE WOMEN HAVE SLAVED AS MAIDS AND NOW WE MOST OF THE TIME IS EITHER THE SOLE BREAD WINNER IF NOT WE MOST OF THE TIME MAKE MORE MONEY THAN THE MAN OF THE HOUSE.....STILL WE ARE TREATED LIKE THINGS HAVE NOT CHANGED. DESPITE ALL THAT STUFF WE ARE FACED WITH I WONDER HOW WE FIND TIME FOR GOSSIP. I HAVE HAD MY SHARE OF BAD MOMENTS ON THIS SITE BUT I REFUSE TO PUT MY HEAD BETWEEN MY LEGS AND RUN....SAME AS U AND TO TOP IT OFF SINCE WE STAND BEHIND OUR VIEWS ON THINGS OUR NAMES ALWAYS ARE BIG AND BOLD....I HAVE STRONG BELIEF THAT THE REAL GOSSIPERS ARE TOO CHICKEN TO PUT THEIR NAMES ON. I HAVE NEVER BEEN ASHAME OF WHERE I CAME FROM BUT DAMN I KNOW WHERE I AM GOING AND WITH THAT PEOPLE OPINIONS HAVE NEVER MATTERED WHEN IT IS NEGATIVE VIBES. U HAVE TAKEN CARE OF BUSINESS AND U WILL KEEP DOING SO BECAUSE U ARE A WOMAN......I AM AGAINST WOMEN THOSE I WILL LABEL WANNABEES....LOL...THOSE ARE TOO BUSY PUTTING OTHERS DOWN INSTEAD OF A FEW ENCOURAGING WORDS...THEY FIND FAULT WITH EVERYTHING...NOW I WANT TO START GOSSIPING ABOUT PEOPLE MAINLY MYSELF AND U AND I CAN HAVE A GOOD LAUGH LIKE ALWAYS...TO BE CONTINUED....PEACE MY GIRL...TO ALL THE GOOD WOMEN OUT THERE KEEP IT UP....TO ALL THE WANNABEES U CAN GET THERE STOP GOSSIPING AND LETS KEEP THE LOVE FLOWING...
AA KOON MWEN! I WAS WONDERING WHEN YOU WOULD START WE...WELCOME TO MY DEE-EE KONH-OU WEER-EE! LOOKING FORWARD KOON! LOL...AND WE ARE FREE TO VIEW AND SHARE OUR OPINIONS ON MY BLOG...WHO VEX TOOF!
Hey G/friend, I am now getting ready to have a family, but I still have so much to consider before bringing a child into the world. I am glad that I am fortunate enough to be in a position to plan for a child rather than accidental pregnancy. Married yes, but lots to think about... Anyway, I think children are a blessing from God, but MEN uh uh! MEN, I need not say more. Don't want to 'contaminate ur site' lol. U take care and keep up the good work.
Lol...common girlfriend....there's no contamination in this when we are speaking the truth and from our hearts...this is exactly what we blog about....something more to discuss will be very interesting, so don't you dare hold back.
And yes, I am also happy for you that you made a lovely little nest before you put your birdies into it..lol...I am wishing you all the best when you do make up your mind to make this future pumkin...lol...and hope this is gonna be soon...as soon as you are ready...love Phylz
"PHILLYS"u know how i always tell you that sometimes when i am home sick,my mind plays tricks on me,well a few days ago while helping my little girl i take care of with home work on her labtop and i am like what the....When did we stop useing pen and paper to do our math problem,Then i realize just how things have change,and our obsession with press the buttons some of us have how many remote controls in our bags, for the garage door,our keyless vehicles,some of us have GPS program to where i an heading,and chart the return trip by pressing"take me home".When you go on the turnpike you no longer need coins u got your Sunpass an it deduct the toll from your cradit card,you no longer have to make an effort to stretch to close the windows in ur vehicle is press a button.you have a cell phone you don't have to remember anyone number,just press the name of the person and the number is dialed automatically, we dont have to use our brains anymore,lol.. what more can we ask for ...Speaking of not using our brains our kids use their"spell check"on the pc to automatically correct their home work..(why learn to spell)..lol.we can text everyone we know around the world,from our cell phones, when we are on a trip we know longer read books,we are plugged into our ipods we can listen to our favorite thousand tunes that we have personally downloaded, when we travel with our kids we know longer talk, or play games with them they have their dvd player so no convesation so if we stop using our brains what kind of future will our kids an grand kids have? just wondering. HOW TIME HAVE CHANGE..
All right cool C, I know exactly where u coming from, I too was thinking how technology has made us out of touch with people around us too. I am not saying it's not a good thing, but it has it's advantages and disadvantage...I even laughed at that when I thought of it, I thought how stupis do we look with a bluetooth on our ear and talking, if someone doesn't see it at first what do you think it looks like to them...that you are nuts, you talking to yourself.....when we sit in the bus with two strings hanging down our ears, not hearing if someone screams..."There is a Bomb on this truck" not being able to hold a conversation with your neighbour because you seem to be the only one nodding to something no one is hearing...how does that make you look, when you are in front of you computer chatting, in a room filled with other people and all of a sudden you burst out with laughter, how does that make you look...these day I realize thecnology have us looking like we are nutts and every other thing they introduce us to make us look even more like we koo koo! So I know exactly what you mean, and listen, I suspect in the coming years, we will just lay down in our beds, with IV's to feed us because we won't want to raise our arms to even eat...and you know what, the strange thing is, if you don't follow, you end up being the one who is ignorant about what's going on in the world presently...so we just have to go with the flow or choose to remain in our little world of illiteracy, so what do we do...we go with the flow....maybe if we didn't you and I would not be blogging today..lol...interesting topic cool C.
The pressing button thing...Yea if i could press a button and reach home, I am waiting for this one...lol...but you know if we just press a button for everything you and I would not be here today? The one thing they will never be able to do is to over power our maker. I think God gave us alot of power and sometimes we use it to destroy each other, but altogether, with him at our sides we will make the ones who think that they have more power than him disappear. There is more to all of us than thinking we know or are more than the other, some of us feel because we can press more buttons than others or drive in fancier cars than others than we are worth more than others, we just have the breath of life, and we don't realize, if it is taken away from us, we are just an image. So why don't we try to be who God wants us to be, try to at least understand each other and make our world a better place to live?
MY GIRL "PHYLLIS" U ROCK.......I LOVE THE WAY YOUR BLOG IS BECOMING ALIVE,IT IS GROWING WITH YOU,JOB WELL DONE!THE SKY'S THE LIMIT YOU KNOW WHAT I LIKE THE MOST ABOUT THIS SITE IS THAT WE CAN BE OUR SELF I HAVE A FEELING THAT ONLY OPEN MAINDED PEOPLE VISIT YOUR BLOG,WEMEN WHO HAVE LOTS OF LOVE,RESPECT,AND UNDERSTANDING TOWORDS EACH OTHER KNOW MATTER WHAT OUR PASS LIFE HAVE BEEN GOOD OR BAD AND THAT'S WHAT MAKES US WHO WE ARE TODAY WE LIVE AND LEARN,YOU HAVE MADE A LOT OF US SIT AND REFLECT ON OUR LIFE AN ASK OUR SELF WHAT CAN WE DO TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN OUR CHILDREN'S LIFE WE NEED TO STICK TOGETHER ONE WOMAN'S CRY IS EVERY OTHER WOMAN'S CRY,I HEARD MY MOM SAY THAT ALOT WHILE GROWING UP AN NOW I GET THE REAL SENCE OF IT ALL MY GIRL, I TELL U DON'T LET STICKS AN STONES BREAK YOUR BONES....GIVE ALL THE GOSSIPING AND NEGATIVE PEOPLE A DEAF EAR....I READ PRESS THE BUTTON COMMENT AND I ALMOST PEEPEE ON ME YOU AND MISS COOL C ARE VERY FUNNY I SAT AN THOUGH ABOUT IT AND IT HIT ME THAT'S SO TRUE,I REMEMBER AS A CHILD WE LOVED THE OUTDOORS PLAYING MOMMY AN DADDY LOOKING FOR NICE TINS TO PLAY HOUSE COOKING IN THE TINS AND CANS,GOIN SHOPPING IN OUR MOTHER'S KITCHEN PLAYING JUMPING ROAPAND JACK STONES,GOING ON MANGOS AND GUAVA HUNT BY THE TIME OUR MOM CALL US FOR FOOD WE ARE SO FULL,AND SOME FAMILY MEMBER OR NEIGHBOR WOULD BE TELLING US SOME STORY THAT WE CANNOT FALL ASLEEP AT NIGHT LOL..BECAUSE OF TODAYS TECHNOLOGY OUR KIDS ARE MISSING OUT ON ALL OF GOOD TIMES
Ou Konhpwan! Yes man...Kondee Juke Bwa! It's so true girlfriend, the child growing up today will never know our stories of childhood if we don't sit and tell them our stories. They will not just know about our kinds of toys, the places we slept, the foods we ate, the games we played, the shoes and clothing we wore, the way our hair was combed, the shops we visited, the merchandise we bought and so on. Even our discipline was done differently...a little rough but we got it anyway. Ther are so many things that the coming generation will never know, first because we are slowly letting go of our culture and we don't talk about our struggles so much, we give in so easily to the wants of our children and deny them the needs, we feel guilty that our kids don't have what it takes to blend in or fit in as some of us put it....but I think if we let our kids know from the beginning of their lives, what we expected to give them and I mean, the things that are more important in their lives, like their needs, their education, didcipline,good morals etc, then they can take that and when they are ready to be on their own, make use of everything and become someone who will be proud of what he/she has become, then they in turn will do the same for their children,but if we give them the wants as soon as they ask for it, they don't know how hard it is to achieve what one needs, muchless the wants, so you know what...the become lazy and they sit and expect everything to come from the parents and they know absolutely nothing about how much you have to struggle financially to give it to them. This is what we teach our children today...and I will be sorry for us if we don't stop this habbit. I have three children and I have worked with many children while I was a preschool administrator, in the past years, I had a chance to evaluate the child and one thing I noticed among many others is that a child knows how to test and adult from a ver young age, and when I say young, I mean very young, like about a few months, ok when I'm not comfortable I can cry and I get attention....ok...well yyyyyyy...the parents comes and checks on him and changes the diaper...it goes on when he is hungry and so on...ok.....now he says let me try something else, you know I like it when she holds me...I feel so warm and comfortable...she plays with me and she gives me lots of attention....ok...when she put me on the bed I'll cry....so he does and we pick them up....that's a nice thing...so I know when I want something all I have to do is cry...he thinks to himself and so he does...and it goes on and on into adulthood...when they probably will not cry but they already come up with better ways to get to the parents...so it goes on and on if...we are not able to control it from childhood...Sorry for Daaaaaht....lol...I don't have perfect kids, but niether do I play with them...I may have raised them alone, but I tried my best to control them. I hope society accepts them and feel free to discipline them in appropriate manner if anyone sees them straying. there are many ways to discipline children without embarrassing them....we ought to learn the appropriate way to do that....and I don't mean the american way, because I see America looking for all kids of excusses for their youths bad behaviour.
Do you think that the absence of a Parent has an effect on a child and if so why?
Do you also think that a child who is unruly always has to do with they way they were brought up.
Do you think that a child who was raised up in a single parents home has lesser chances of becoming an outstanding person in society?
Let's talk ladies, lets share some views on that, and also lets talk about the forms of discipline or how far we would go in disciplining our children. Let's roll with respect and admiration for all women and their opinions...and remember we are sharing opinions so we don't necessarily have to agree with all what is said here, but we can disagree and a very respectful manner...Let's roll!
OK MY SISTER!this subject is interesting,and i know we will agree to disagree... i do not believe that the absence of a parent or parents have anything to do with a child upbring, cause i know so many people who grew up with a family memeber or even strangers, and they turn out just fine,no criminal records they turn out to be respectful and outstanding people in our community, so no i do not think it affect them as long as they are getting unconditional love and their necessity..but i do think parents need to play an important part in their children's life even if they can't give them their necessity love cost notthing i grew up with my mom and someone who a stranger to me i think i turn out fine enough,growing up my father the only thing can remember him giving me is five cents every fridays and i use to look forword to that comimg from school on a friday i know where i would find him in a rum shop ,and i loved him at that time to death. now that i am all grown up i realize what an ass he was i forgive him and my mom bless her soul she would not let us say anything bad about him..Children who is unruly not all the time it has to do with the way they were brough up,sometimes it have to do with friends they chooes they want to belong,they feel left out of the family and also sometimes society have alot to do with the way our children behave when people in authority tell them they are bad and will not amount to nothing that thay are not good enough to around their kids like their kids are made out of gold an other kids are made out of dirt choops,most of the kids are not bad kids they have a problem, AD OR ADHD ....ATTENTION DEFICIT HYPERACTIVITY DISORDER .......parents befor u call ur children all kind of nasty names please GOOGLE ADHD an read about it will give u a better knowledege and understanding of why ur children are behaving the way they are, we have to motivate our kids to be the best that they can possibly be,as for the discipline i think u as a parent should know ur kids and chooes a form of discipline that work for them am sorry the belt don't work at all that's my opionion baby let's countinue sharing the love and agree to disagree...
PHILLYS i must say congratilation on your blog; I have to agree that parents should play a role in there children's life, that being said.My sisters brothers and i grow up with our grand mother and grand father and we turn out fine our mom went away to make a better leaving for us and i am happy with that,we all have our family now when we left St Lucia we were over 16 years old yea we got our share of whiping from all the older family members in the yard and we turn out just fine mabe thats what made us who we are today,so most of us had different fathers they hadly would come around our grandparents never send any one of us to ask our fathers any thing they would give when they felt like it and that how they were my sisters and brothers and i were happy kids growing up we did not have much but my grandma always make do with what she had i remember going to children's day at Mr Gaston remember there was a lady called Aunty Non my grandma was friend with and she use to sew for our grandma and sometimes she did not have money to pay for what ever sewing that she did for us so some of what ever my grandpa bring home from the garden we would take to her for sewing payment,so i will disagree with any one who would say not having a parent or parents in a child life would make become unruly orhas a lesser chance of becoming a well discipline an outstanding person in society.......thats my opinon.....my god bless u girlfriend
I BELIEVE THAT ALTHOUGH PARENTS CAN DO EVERYTHING IN THEIR POWER TO MAKE SURE THEIR KID TURN OUT TO BE AN OUTSTANDING PERSON IN SOCIETY, EVENTUALLY THEY DECIDE IF THEY WANT TO TAKE THE PATH THAT THEIR HARD WORKING PARENTS SET FOR THEM. I BELIEVE THAT SOME SINGLE PARENT DO AS GREAT A JOB AS TWO PARENTS. IF YOU AND YOUR KIDS ARE ON THE SAME WAVE LENGTH AND YOU CAN ACTUALLY "COMMUNICATE" THERE IS NOTHING THAT U GUYS CANNOT ACHIEVE. ON THE "UNRULY" PART THAT ONE IS HARD......SOMETIMES IT'S THE PARENTS FAULT NOT BEING FIRM ENOUGH.....AND SOMETIMES ITS THE PEER PRESSURE.....THAT IS WHY WE HAVE TO TRY AND ENSURE THAT OUR KIDS ARE CONFIDENT ENOUGH TO DECIDE THAT IT'S GREAT TO LEAD AND NOT FOLLOW(BAD COMPANY THAT IS)......I HAVE A TWELVE YEAR OLD WHO WENT SHOPPING WITH ME ONE SATURDAY AND THIS YOUNG LADY FELL IT BLEW ME AWAY WHEN I HEARD HER SAY "HE SALOP".... I TURN AROUND AND SAID WHAT DID U SAY AND SHE JUST LOOK AT ME SPEECHLESS...I COULD NOT RECALL WHEN LAST I USED THAT EXPRESSION.......WHAT DID I DO CRACK UP INSIDE BECAUSE THAT WAS THE GOOD OLD WAY I WOULD SAY IT WELL DRAGGED AND A LITTLE LOUD TO THE END....BUT I TOLD HER IF I EVER HEARD HER SAY IT WHEN SOMEONE COULD BE SERIOUSLY HURT I WOULD ENSURE THAT SHE COULD NOT SIT FOR A FEW DAYS....DOES THAT MAKE ME TWO FACED MAYBE BUT AT LEAST I LET HER KNOW THAT IT WAS NOT A NICE THING TO SAY SOMETIMES WE AS PARENT DO AND SAY THINGS TO OUR KIDS ABOUT LIFE THAT WE HAVE DONE THE TOTAL OPPOSITE OF, BUT WE MOSTLY TEACH FROM OUR MISTAKES OR OTHERS THAT WE KNOW MISTAKES, AND WOULD NOT LIKE OUR KIDS TO REPEAT SAME. TO ALL THE PARENTS OUT THERE U KNOW WHAT WORKS BEST FOR YOU KEEP IT UP AND NEVER FEEL BAD ABOUT ASKING OTHERS FOR HELP.....I ALWAYS LIKE TO DISCUSS WITH FRIEND WHAT WORKS AND WHAT DOESN'T WITH MY APPROACH TO PARENTING AND THEIRS....I HAVE LEARNT THAT IT IS NOT HOW EXPENSIVE THE REWARD IT IS JUST THAT THER IS A REWARD....FOR ME 90% OF THE TIME IT IS A BOOK, HAVING A SLEEP OVER OR LITTLE THINGS THAT SAY TO THEM I AM AWARE THAT YOU ARE WORKING HARD.
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